How to Deal With an Eating Disorder During Pregnancy

When I told a counselor about my eating disorder, he did a terribly unhelpful thing: he scared me. He launched into a story about his anorexic niece who had been unable to conceive a child, even after returning to a healthy body weight. I was nineteen, petrified both of gaining weight and the physical effects of my starvation-binge-purge cycle, and the counselor's story merely terrified me more. If I eventually wanted a child, would I be able to become pregnant or would I forever pay the price of damaging my body? How would I respond to the inevitable pregnancy weight gain? Would the beauty of carrying a child in my womb offset the fear of gaining weight, or make things worse?

Eventually, counseling, supportive friends and family, and lifestyle changes helped me recover from my self-destructive behavior. My weight returned to normal. My fears subsided. My body image improved. Then I got pregnant and the old weight gain fears threatened to return as the number on the scale increased. Thankfully, my mindset had changed enough that I could cope with my gradually increasing weight.

Here are a few things I found helpful during my pregnancy.

Seek professional help. A good counselor won't scold or terrify you with horror stories. There is no shame in going to a counselor or a psychiatrist. Many people need professional help to deal with issues in their lives, so don't feel as if you are the only one who has ever needed assistance. You're not alone.

Let your ob-gyn know about your disorder as soon as possible. Again, a compassionate medical caregiver won't scold you but will encourage you to gain a healthy amount of weight. Since serious health issues can arise from starving, binging, overeating or purging, the caregiver needs to keep an eye out for any problems. It's a safety measure for you and for your unborn baby.

Don't surround yourself with diet-crazed people. Instead, seek out friends who don't talk incessantly about eating, food, weight loss, and dieting. I wish I had done this. Some of my female acquaintances made tacky remarks about the amount of food I ate or how skinny I was for a pregnant woman. There's nothing worse than dealing with an eating disorder and having those around you blabber about their latest fad diet.

Educate yourself on healthy eating habits. Of all the professionals I saw while battling bulimia and anorexia, my nutritionist was the most helpful. He taught me about food groups, making healthy food choices, and dealing with difficult situations such as dining out or people who tried to sabotage my recovery efforts.

An easy-to-moderate exercise program may help calm your fears that your weight gain is out of control. For me, doing the elliptical machine at the gym for a half hour a few days a week helped level out my cranky, hormonal moods, helped me focus on having a healthy body rather than an ideal one, and gave me a social outlet. But if working out becomes an obsession, or if it has been part of your disorder's symptoms, talk to your health care professional about whether this is advisable for you.

Remember that weight gain in pregnancy is vital to your baby's development. Nourish your body with healthy food so your little one can grow. Focus on loving the life developing inside you. He or she is the reason you are pregnant!

Remember that pregnancy doesn't last forever, and neither does the postpartum period.

In the end, I had a beautiful baby, a tiny person who didn't care that her mama's body wasn't the supposedly ideal one. Every body part that I had deemed fat were ones that cared for her. I carried her in my arms, cuddled her against my chest, let her sleep on my stomach, and paced the floor with her at midnight on weary legs and feet. For my child, her mama's body was perfect the way it was. Chances are your baby will feel the same way.